Maren reads a deleted scene from Educating Emily, the story she wrote for The Bodice Ripper Project live show. She also talks a bit about what it was like creating and developing the show, and the challenges that she faced getting so vulnerable.
The music played during this episode:
- Original music from The Bodice Ripper Project by Melissa Dunphy, performed by Grant Loehnig. Used with permission.
Follow Maren on Instagram: @supermaren
Facebook: https://facebook.com/maren.montalbano
Replays of the livestream Bodice Ripper Project show (October 2, 3 & 4, 2020) are available for purchase: http://www.bodiceripperproject.com/
Purchase Maren’s debut book, Pandemic Passion: A COVID-19 novella on Kindle: https://amzn.to/3guGck0
Transcript
(orchestra tuning)
Hello and welcome to The Bodice Ripper Project, an exploration of sexuality, feminism, and the journey to self-empowerment through the lens of romance novels.
I’m Maren Montalbano, opera singer, coach, and writer.
In this episode, I talk about my one-woman show which just closed at the Philadelphia Fringe Festival this past weekend, and I’ll read a deleted chapter from Educating Emily, the story I wrote for the one-woman show.
So make yourself comfortable, loosen your bodice, and let’s begin!
(intro music plays)
Welcome and thanks for pushing play. Oh my gosh. What a wild couple of weeks it has been since my last episode. I went through tech week for my show, as well as another production, with a choir called The Crossing, at the same time. In the exact same time period, my brain was filled with a huge amount of information. And actually two of the performances were on the same day.
So I was running from my performance to get to The Crossing’s performance, and vice versa. It was pretty hilarious. It actually reminded me of pre COVID days when I was, you know, running from gig to gig. Uh, so it was a, it was a good feeling, being that industrious. I am very grateful to be gigging, but if there’s one thing that COVID has taught me, it’s the power of slowing down and really recognizing where you are and just being in the moment. And I don’t want to let go of that. Even in my busiest times.
Doing gigs like this and working with groups like The Crossing is so inspiring for me, because it shows me that despite all of the stuff you see on social media and the fact that the world is on fire, literally, and there’s a pandemic, and all of these bad things are happening, there’s also still so much good and wonder and creativity and innovation.
Getting to work with groups like The Crossing, getting to work on my own show, all of those things are what keep me going during the dark times.
I mean, seriously, one of the reasons why I started this podcast, that I decided to go ahead and make my show a digital show, was because I needed a creative outlet. And I also felt like people needed an escape.
You know? My show is very — well, you know, you’re listening, right? It’s silly, it’s thoughtful, and it just feels like people need an escape. We’re more than six months into this pandemic, and I feel like there’s some people that are really struggling.
And maybe just taking 45 minutes out of your day to listen to some romance, watch somebody read romance, is my contribution to helping ease some of the tension in the world.
It’s very small, but it’s what I can do. Be the change that you wish to see in the world? Right? That’s what’s happening with me.
So now that the Bodice Ripper Project is done, that the live stream performance is done, I wanted to do a little bit of reflection on how far I’ve come. You know, making a work like this is not easy, but I definitely found it extremely rewarding.
It started as a seed of an idea in 2018. I simply knew that I wanted it make a project. I needed to have another thing happening. Two years before, I had finished my solo album, and that felt good, but I knew I wasn’t done. And so I was like, what’s next? Am I going to make another album? Is it going to be recital? Is it going to be something that I’m going to tour? What is this?
So I ended up taking a course and it ended up putting me in contact with some really amazing people, including getting a lot of one on one coaching, and that’s something that I really never had before. I highly recommended it.
While I was taking that course and trying to figure out what is this idea that I want to make an impact with, I was also telling these romance stories. I was meeting new people and telling them about these stories. And one of them suggested that maybe I set it to music. And I was like, “Huh! I think that’s a great idea.” And so, you know, it morphed from, “Maybe I’m going to commission this, it’ll turn into a song cycle, or maybe it’ll turn into an album or possibly a recital.”
And I ended up having another conversation with a friend who does a lot of cabaret. And he said, “You could absolutely make this into a one woman show, but you really need to find something that’s truly vulnerable that you can share with the audience.”
Then it really started to bloom. I started writing the actual romance story, which is called Educating Emily, that I read in the show. And I’m going to read you a chapter from that here.
And it went through a lot of drafts. I brought collaborators in, I sought the advice of friends who are writers, and I got some really helpful comments on my drafts. And for those of you who are considering your own works, especially if you’re writing, constructive criticism is so helpful.
It’s super important that you remember to keep yourself open, because there is also a lot of resistance, that comes up in this process that will make you feel insecure or that possibly the criticism that you’re getting is not constructive, all of that kind of thing.
If there’s any kind of advice that I can give right now, it would be really just keep yourself open. The people who you are talking with, who are giving you their thoughts, they want you to succeed.
Some of the best advice that I got while creating this was – and this, this actually came from a couple of different people who have done shows that have this level of vulnerability to them – is that it was very important that I have emotional support, especially getting closer and closer to the performance. Because you know, talking about childhood sexual abuse is not really that fun.
And I talked about this already in one of my previous episodes, and it brings up a lot of feelings that have lain dormant for a long, long, long time. It’s kind of like stirring the pot, you know, stuff comes up from the deep. Some of those emotions show up when you least expect them, at probably really inappropriate times.
So having the emotional support of my coaches, my friends, my husband, has really been the thing that’s carried me forward with strength.
I know that I was able to transmute that pain into something really beautiful and hopeful. And I’m so grateful to my past self for taking the time to make that transformation and do it with care.
So what’s next for me? I still have a few more episodes left in this season of the podcast. So I’m not going to leave you just yet. I know this episode is coming out a little bit late, and honestly it’s because I needed time to rest after my big weekend, and I’m fully honoring that.
I’m not ashamed of taking care of myself, and you shouldn’t be either.
I have some pretty exciting stuff planned for season two, including interviews with authors, composers, and other creatives who are working on their own projects.
And I am going to be launching an eight week course about taking performance projects out of your head and putting it out into the world. I will talk a little bit more about that in the next couple of episodes.
It’s starting in a couple of weeks. I am already really excited about the group that I’ve got enrolled at the moment. I’m very happy to expand. It’s really for performing artists who are starting a creative project, but they’re really at the beginning stages, and they don’t know how to make it into a reality. So this course is for you, if that’s you.
The quarantine has been a time for reflection. It’s been a time to go inward. But the thing that’s kept me from getting lost within myself is having a creative project, something to really bring me joy and bring joy to others.
I’m curious if that’s you. Have you been working on a creative project, some kind of performance, or something that sustains you and really brings you joy even in the darkest hours? I really want to know.
So now onto the story.
The story that I’m going to read is a lost chapter or deleted chapter from Educating Emily. Educating Emily is a story that I wrote for the Bodice Ripper Project show, the one-woman show. It is the story that I read during the show.
Actually in the process of developing the show, I wrote quite a few scenes. I have all of the makings of a romance novel; it just needs to be filled in. But, I took many of those scenes and I tried to stuff them all into the show and it just wasn’t working. A lot of them were too wordy. it’s one thing to be reading these florid phrases on the page, and it’s another thing to be reading them aloud. And this is what I discovered through this process. So I had to cut a lot of stuff.
But this scene I actually wrote after I wrote most of the other stuff. I was trying to get myself back into the place that I was when I was writing them backstage. All of these stories that I wrote backstage at the opera, it was part of my actor preparing kind of thing. And so I imagined myself in the dressing room, and I just pulled out my iPad, and I said, I started typing away. And this is what came out. So it was a very short little scene that could be somewhere in the novel, if I ever write it.
Essentially what’s happening in the story is, the year is 1895. Emily Sewell is an heiress from Maryland. She’s been sent to live with her aunt and uncle in Philadelphia to get a husband. Um, but she’s also a suffragette. She doesn’t really want to get married.
Yes, she’s very complicated. That’s how I wrote her. I’m a complicated person too.
Her uncle ends up hiring a piano teacher to give her a little bit more polish. And that is Daniel Wood. And of course there’s instant attraction and they have to sit next to each other on the piano bench all the time. And there’s like all this suppressed emotion, it’s hot.
These are the best scenes, when, like, nobody can actually do anything, but everybody’s thinking all the things. It’s completely forbidden because of class differences.
In this little scenelet that I wrote separately, the deleted scene, it takes place on the Main Line, which is kind of a suburb where all of the rich Philadelphians, especially in the Victorian age, have their country estates.
So Emily’s been invited for a weekend in the country. This is a big trope with romance novels. Some of them have the best love scenes when the two lovers are caught outside of their comfort zones and they kind of feel like they can get away with a little bit more.
So without further ado, I bring you Educating Emily.
Educating Emily
The Lost Chapter
Emily awoke to the smell of burning wood.
She had fallen asleep on some pillows in the folly, having escaped the Lippincotts and their tedious conversations about marriage. She was beginning to regret accepting their invitation to the Main Line for the weekend.
Smoke drifted towards her, and she coughed. Had someone started a campfire nearby? Emily stood up cautiously to investigate.
Sure enough, not six yards away from her in the meadow below, sat a man facing away from her, feeding a small campfire with twigs.
Not just any man.
It was Daniel.
Emily’s heart skipped a beat. What was he doing here? A thousand thoughts filled her head at once. She wanted to smile, frown, scream, and cry…so all she did was stare, mouth agape.
He was dressed much more casually than she had ever seen him. His jacket was nowhere to be seen, and the sleeves of his shirt were rolled up to his elbows, exposing his muscular forearms. The flickering shadows emphasized the angles of his chiseled jaw, fuzzy with evening stubble, and Emily had the urge to run her hand along his cheek.
He leaned forward again, poking at the fire, and she saw how his trousers clung to his sculpted thighs. That sensation was beginning to wash over her again, one which only happened when Daniel was near: heat was building in her womanhood and radiating out to her extremities. She imagined what it would be like if she just ran to him and threw herself into his arms. She sighed in pleasure with the thought.
He turned towards the sound and saw her. They stared at each other for what seemed to be an eternity.
She opened her mouth, but no words came out.
He grinned mischievously. “I thought I’d take the weekend to do some…camping,” he said with a shrug. “And the Lippincotts kindly allowed me to use their estate.”
She cocked her head, arms akimbo. “You came to check up on me.”
“I…might have been interested in how your suitors are getting along with–” he paused to stare as she picked up her skirts and barrelled towards him down the hill, launching herself into his arms.
She wrapped her arms around his neck, pressed her cheek against his chest, and squeezed, listening to the rapid beat of his heart. “You came to check up on me.”
His arms held her close as he stroked her hair, his hand unconsciously caressing the curls at the nape of her neck.
Neither spoke, but their bodies communicated without words. Emily felt her heart beat in time with his, and her breathing became shallow. The feel of his bare hand on her bare neck made her want more contact with his skin. She leaned back to look at him.
He was staring at her, his eyes dark with passion and concern. “You know this isn’t…”
“I know.”
He dragged his hand softly along her jaw and tipped her chin up. She opened her mouth and he ran a thumb along her lower lip. His electric touch lit up her body, and she sighed, relaxing into him.
With a growl, he leaned forward and captured her mouth, first tasting her delicately with licks and nibbles until desire erupted within her and she returned his kiss with all the wantonness of a woman of the night.
And I will leave it there.
Join me next time, as I begin reading Parisian Pleasures, a story I wrote during a production of La Traviata.
He lowered his head to steal a kiss, and Babette could feel her hands, of their own volition, slide slowly up his muscled shoulders to entwine themselves in his hair.
I have a couple more things I want to say about my Fringe show before I take off.
First of all, I am so grateful to those of you who did show up. I really appreciated all of the inspired, enthusiastic engagement, and I just simply had a blast. You really made my weekend. You made my whole year. Seriously.
If you missed the show, and you’re like, “Maren, what am I going to do? How am I going to be able to live?” I’ve got your back. I have all of the replays available for purchase for $15 on my website, bodiceripperproject.com.
And on the subject of gratitude, even though this was a one-woman show, and I did a whole bunch of stuff myself, including being my own tech crew and trying to figure out lighting and setting up my costumes and being a wig person. I could not have done it without the support of the people with whom I surrounded myself.
Particularly my director, Vanessa Ogbuehi, and my composer, Melissa Dunphy, both of whom really, truly understood what I was trying to achieve and put the best of themselves into supporting my vision.
And I also could not have done this without the help of my coaches. I had several coaches over the past two years.
But the ones that I want to shout out to are Lisa Husseini, Jennifer Rosenfeld, and Abby Wright, all of whom are phenomenal coaches. And each of whom has brought her own special magic to my process.
Now I love hearing from you all the time. So if there was anything that struck you about this episode or any other episode, please reach out. I’m on Instagram @supermaren. Go ahead and send me a DM. I respond to those pretty quickly.
And remember, if you want more livestream goodness, head on over to bodiceripperproject.com and purchase yourself the all-access pass for $15.
All right. See you next time.
The Bodice Ripper Project is a production of Compassionate Creative, and was conceived, written, and edited by me, Maren Montalbano. The background music during the story was written by Melissa Dunphy and performed by Grant Loehnig, and the theme music was also written by yours truly. If you liked what you heard, I invite you to give this podcast a 5-star rating! I’ll see you next time.